Health and Beauty

Beach for Self Care

I took some time for self care yesterday at the beach. I try to make it to the beach at least once a week, even if only for an hour or so.

Yesterday was 78 degrees, with a light breeze, and only a few clouds. I decided it wasn’t going to get better than that so I grabbed a beach chair and a towel and made the 10-15 minute drive to one of the local beaches.

I enjoyed laying out in the sun, listening to the sound of the waves, watching a family frolic in the waves, watching a pelican float along on the waves, and was lucky enough to see the SpaceX Falcon 9 Starlink launch!!! It was neat to see everybody on the beach standing and looking north to catch the launch. My parents saw a launch from their house on Monday and said they could even see the separation event. This one wasn’t nearly as close as that one. It traveled more east than south. Still pretty cool to see on a random trip to the beach.

I have decided the beach is good for the soul and I must stick to my goal of making it there at least once a week. If not for me, I need to do it for all my loved ones in PA and DE who are enduring the winter!

The little bright spot is the SpaceX Falcon 9 launch

For thee and for me

I give myself unconditional love
Self affirmation #3 from https://wildsimplejoy.com/affirmations-self-worth/

I tend to beat myself up over things. For example, I’ll replay situations in my mind and think of all the different ways I should have responded. And I’ll feel silly, stupid, not empathetic enough, not assertive enough, and the list goes on. I know I am my own harshest critic.

Toward others, though, I am the essence of loving, kind, caring, empathetic, and gracious. I am a believer and a cheerleader and a fan. I absolutely love people. I love their quirks and “flaws.” I cannot help but see the good in them.

I was once asked why I’m not as gracious with myself as I am with others. I had no good answer. Still don’t. And instead of wasting time thinking of an answer for that, I’m going to flip the narrative.

This third self affirmation statement has me thinking that I should be able to love myself as unconditionally as I love others. I love thee and thus I should be able to love me. That’s it. I’m not going to make it any more complicated than that.

Am I allowed to question?

Here is the second self affirmation statement on the website I referenced yesterday:

“I am whole just as I am.”
Self affirmation #2 from https://wildsimplejoy.com/affirmations-self-worth/

I think I have to disagree. Is that okay? I’m committed to no longer listening to my head trash, but I’m not sure I’m capable of blindly believing/repeating something I found on a random website without at least running it through the Jill mill.

My natural inclination toward all things science has always lead me to be a questioner. I believe wholeheartedly in the power of questioning. It will either reaffirm your initial opinion or it will help change it. Either outcome is good. What worries me is when things aren’t questioned.

In this case I go beyond science to faith. I am not whole just as I am if I am without God. And I don’t want to be without God. I tried that. It didn’t work. At all.

I could spend another paragraph or two debating also that people lose themselves, get lost, or are otherwise less than whole, for a lot of reasons. But I will spare us all that tangent for now.

So, in my typical fashion, I am going to look at this in such a way that it is still positive and beneficial. After questioning this second self affirmation statement, I feel reaffirmed in faith. And I propose this small yet incredibly important change to the statement: I am whole just as I am, in the Lord God.

“May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.”
1 Thessalonians 5:23 NIV

Addendum from a dear sweet friend: Isaiah 43:1-2 are beautiful promises also. “But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you. O Israel, the one who formed you says, “Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine. When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.”

Wrestling with the quiet

It’s been a while since I posted…..

As my big move was looming, I was fortunate to get to spend some quality time with great friends. At dinner one night with two of them, we talked about how a struggle I was probably going to face was wrestling with the quiet. My move was effectively removing a lot of noise from my life. And I needed to be aware of embracing the quiet, not just refilling my life with noise.

Well, I’ve found that has come true. However, not quite like I had imagined. Instead of refilling my life with external noise, I’ve allowed internal noise in. Which might be even more distracting.

Without my career, my friends, and my material accomplishments, I’ve lost some of my identity and sense of self worth. It took another conversation with a friend to identify this is what’s been going on.

And, I’m actually okay with this “loss” because we really shouldn’t find our self worth in those external things anyway. Rather, our self worth should come from being our flawed, unique, and lovely selves.

Starting today, I’m taking back control. Step by step. Piece by piece. I’m pushing out the head trash and replacing it with positive self affirmations.

More than likely you have some external or internal noise that’s distracting you from feeling your true self worth too. If you’re so inclined, take some time to reflect on that and the following two quotes:

“I am worthy. I am loved. I am enough.”
Self affirmation #1 from https://wildsimplejoy.com/affirmations-self-worth/

“You are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you.”
Isaiah 43:4

Gratitude

I started the day out by sleeping in until 7:30. This might not seem like sleeping in, but for someone who got up at 5:30 am every work day for years, it is. It was nice to stay in bed until the sun was out.

I decided today would be my first run. And let me clarify quickly that I use the word “run” loosely here. I laced up and headed out. It was gorgeous. 53 degrees, mostly sunny, with shadows cast by the rising sun.

My self talk can be kind of head trashy during runs. Today wasn’t too bad for that. I did have thoughts about wishing I was a faster runner, but then I passed some older folks who were walking and I thought to myself, “they probably see me running and wish they could still run. I should be grateful that I can run, even if it’s not very fast.”

And that’s the crux of today. Gratitude. It’s an attitude and it’s so important. I was inspired by a text from a friend today about being grateful. Instead of being unhappy that I didn’t sleep longer, I was grateful to sleep until the sun was up. Instead of beating myself up for a slow pace (on my first run in weeks), I was grateful to be out running at all. Instead of missing my boy, I’m going to cherish the joy-filled times I had with him.

Appreciate what you have. Especially your health. When you don’t have that, it’s hard to have much else. Be grateful for all things, big and small.

“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Hair

Hair, both beautiful and vile. When it’s attached to your head, it is prized and cared for. When it’s unattached from your head, it is gross and repellant. Think of how much time and money we spend on our hair, just to shed it or cut it off.

And although I’m not super girly, I do love getting my hair done. There’s just something therapeutic about chatting at the salon, enjoying someone else washing my hair, and the excitement of a new color and/or a cut.

This is yet another example of going someplace different from normal and enjoying good people. I love listening to the conversations in a salon. There’s something special about the conversations that occur between people who have an intimate relationship but only see each other every 10 weeks or so.